CARPE NECK

Marie-Antoinette[2006]DvDrip[Eng]-aXXo

Tue, 22 Nov 2011 18:54:33 -0500

Marie-Antoinette[2006]DvDrip[Eng]-aXXo

Messages

Sun, 07 Aug 2011 13:02:15 -0400

Messages

you can be my disapproving mentor anyday, Davey.

Fri, 08 Jul 2011 14:35:59 -0400

you can be my disapproving mentor anyday, Davey.

grimdark phil collins. by old milwaukee, magnor’s, anna,...

Sat, 25 Jun 2011 14:39:34 -0400

grimdark phil collins. by old milwaukee, magnor’s, anna, alysha mo and yours truly.

FUCK YEAH USE YOUR MIND SONIC BOOM HELL YEAH

Thu, 23 Jun 2011 18:06:08 -0400

FUCK YEAH USE YOUR MIND SONIC BOOM HELL YEAH

gotta hand it to you Sonic you the best~

Thu, 23 Jun 2011 14:30:54 -0400

gotta hand it to you Sonic

you the best~

HAPPY FUCKING 20th SONIC THE HEDGEHOG love you forever you swag...

Thu, 23 Jun 2011 14:25:14 -0400

HAPPY FUCKING 20th SONIC THE HEDGEHOG

love you forever you swag motherfucker

Hey look, it’s Tomb Raider: Rape Escape! How do you...

Wed, 08 Jun 2011 13:57:00 -0400

Hey look, it’s Tomb Raider: Rape Escape!

How do you recreate Lara Croft for a new audience? Easy! Violate her repeatedly!

Isn’t it so lovely to be able to vote in this great...

Mon, 02 May 2011 20:08:59 -0400

Isn’t it so lovely to be able to vote in this great country~

HAPPY ELECTION DAY CANADA

Mon, 02 May 2011 19:57:36 -0400

HAPPY ELECTION DAY CANADA

Same guy who did the LET’S PLAY SONIC 1 EASY MODE. My...

Fri, 17 Dec 2010 03:04:00 -0500

Same guy who did the LET’S PLAY SONIC 1 EASY MODE. My hero~

THE WEEKEND

Thu, 16 Dec 2010 19:48:00 -0500

Music and besties are ponderous elements of my urban life, and thus as a blogger dwelling the frontiers of new electronic music and pals 4 life, i feel compelled to hype them both as much as is reasonable.

The Weekend is (was? you didn’t hear it from me :S) an R&B project from good ol’ Toronto. They are:

Jeremy Rose (producer/roommate/bestie)

Abel Tesfaye (vocalist/all-around-weirdo)

They’ve been getting some hype lately from places like

The Fader

Itzsoweezee

DRAKE’S BLOG

and remixed by the likes of

BABE RAINBOW WHO IS A WARP RECORDS ARTIST WHOA (this remix is really kinda weird)

THIS GUY FROM ITSZOWEEZEE (this is more like it sorta)

again, you didn’t hear it from me ;) but J-Rose is really good and sitting on piles of stuff that’s even more killer and some attention would probably convince him to release it.

SO CLACK THEM MOUSES AND GET LISTENIN’

KETSUI aka DEADLY SUICIDE EMBARASSMENT SHOOTING is finally...

Thu, 16 Dec 2010 19:26:00 -0500

KETSUI aka DEADLY SUICIDE EMBARASSMENT SHOOTING is finally playable in MAME!

APC is my first day score! This game is awesome but it is also very embarassing.

Maybe i’ll post a super deadly superplay soon!

PRO REVIEW DEADLY PREMONITION

Tue, 14 Dec 2010 17:28:00 -0500

Just finished this game a couple days ago and i am often finding myself sitting on the couch staring at the game box and wondering if SWERY has what it takes to save the world~

This is an excellent thing, here. It’s TWIN PEAKS via SILENT HILL via EXTREMELY AFFABLE JAPANESE MAN with a TINY BUDGET and ZERO PRETENSION

(SWERY, the director, is on the right. His positivity is positively creepy considering the game i just played)

PROS:

-THIS GAME IS LIKE SHENMUE. If that is not cool to you then well you know whatever

-AGENT FRANCIS YORK MORGAN is the fucking protagonist of the century. Let me sum this guy up real quick.

Agent Francis York Morgan is an arrogant, glassy-eyed, nigh-psychic FBI profiler with an extremely infectious smile. Call him York, that’s what everybody calls him. He has an imaginary friend named ZACH with whom he frequently and publically discusses such things as 80s action flicks and punk rock bands, attributes of surrounding characters, horrifying murders he’s worked in meticulous detail, along with the usual solving the case stuff. His ace-case-closing, murder-mystery-solving technique involves psychic nicotine-induced hallucinations and divination via coffee. He is perpetually calm and exhibits no signs of stress for the entire duration of the game. Dale Cooper doesn’t have shit on this guy. There is a button dedicated to causing York to talk to himself while driving.

Moving on

-THE CHARACTERS ARE FANTASTIC. Including but not limited to creepy psychic twin boys, a transvestite, a lady who predicts the future with a pot (log lady,) a creepy millionaire with a skull-gas-mask for a face who puts cereal in his sandwich and a servant that speaks only in rhyme, and an amazingly inappropriately erotic gas station attendant

-THERE’S SOME SHIT TO DO IN THIS GAME. Side-quests are abundant, not long or ardurous enough to be annoying, and the characters around town are so odd and so fascinating that the conversations peppered throughout are more than enough payoff. You can delay the main quest as long as you want to do them, and even if some shit happens and someone dies (oh yeah spoiler it’s a murder mystery people die) you can replay previous chapters. Also, you can stalk pretty much everybody and eat a seriously baffling variety of food mmhm

-THE STORY IS LEGIT. Seems like just a really oddly executed Twin Peaks ripoff at first, but ends up being totally legit in its own right. The characters are full of quirk and personality, there are no glaring plotholes to speak of and every thread of mystery has a satisfying payoff, mostly because

-THE LAST FOUR HOURS OF THIS GAME ARE INCREDIBLE. Plot tension and assorted wacky shit ratchets up tenfold and manages to turn even the silliest devices and most minute details into GENIUS FORESHADOWING and COMPLEX SYMBOLISM. There are TOTALLY UNEXPECTED WELL-EXECTUED NARRATIVE REVERSALS and AWESOME BOSS FIGHTS.

-BEST USE OF AMAZING GRACE IN A GAME EVER. and the rest of the music is really memorable

-THE PAUSE MENU IS RELEVANT TO THE PLOT. If this isn’t indicative of quality then i don’t know what is

-THE CARS HAVE TURN SIGNALS

-IT’S ALWAYS REALLY OBVIOUS WHAT YOU HAVE TO DO NEXT which is only nice because the game is so mechanically frustrating at times

-VOICE ACTING IS PRETTY GOOD and really helps make the game what it is, adds to the atmosphere and shit

-EXTREME CULT APPEAL will totally make you hip and attractive to your various nerdy friends and girl-things

-THIS GAME IS TWENTY DOLLARS and since it’s been out for a while it’s probably even less now

CONS:

-THE COMBAT IS REALLY CLUNKY. But the game offers such numerous ways to make combat as painless as possible that this is largely irrelevant if you’re not really boring and/or a moron.

-EVERY TIME YOU PICK UP AN ITEM everything stops and the screen goes black and you are shown your terribly rendered item that is probably a fucking lollipop you don’t want or need spin around and around for four whole seconds. This is aggravating until you realize you can just press start to skip it

-THERE ARE FEW VEGETARIAN MEAL OPTIONS. And seriously what the fuck is with that turkey sandwich.

-THE MAP FUCKING SUCKS it does this stupid thing where it always justifies the way York is facing as north so it’s impossible to figure out where the fuck you are half the time especially cause you can’t zoom out very far or mark waypoints or nothin. This sucks cos’ it’s such a useful thing seeing as everything in the entire game is clearly marked on the map but it’s so clunky to use that

-DRIVING AROUND WOULD REALLY FUCKIN’ SUCK IF YORK DIDN’T TALK TO HIMSELF/ZACH ABOUT JOY DIVISION. The driving controls are finicky and the outdoor graphics in this game are really fuckin’ low-rent. But York and Zach get to have these wonderful little chats. I even avoided using the fast-travel just so i could listen to as many of these as i can

-IT SUCKS THAT THIS GAME HAD SUCH A TERRIBLE BUDGET because there’s so much interesting stuff in the art and design here that its a shame it couldn’t have been properly treated. I would have gladly paid fifty dollars for this if it looked better

IN CLOSING I want to stress that this game is not “so bad it’s good,” this game is legitimately great. I guarantee you that any fucking games journalist that shit their pants and called this game “so bad it’s _____” did not see the last couple hours. I am a pretentious asshole but this game is not and it charmed the shit out of me and given a look beneath its jaggy exterior it will charm you too!

tl;dr 10/10 GOTY 2010 very good would play again

QUICK REVIEW: TUMBLR.COM

Thu, 09 Dec 2010 13:13:00 -0500

Tumblr is the blogging platform i have (unfortunately?) chosen to dump my steaming shitpile all over

PROS:

-Clean, intuitive interface

-(Mostly) free, very accomodating to unemployment

-Decent iphone app

-Pretty intersting community, Tumblr Tuesday is actually not complete garbage like most community cocksucking feeds tend to be

-Nobody I know uses Tumblr, thus adding to geek cred

-Is not Twitter

CONS:

-I will never ever ever ever ever pay fifty dollars for a goddamned blog theme

-No Kanye West/Lil B/Wiz Khalifa

-Servers are down all the time

-Scarily resembles Twitter, shares investors

-Web 2.0 = tons o’ douchebags

Oh yeah, first post.